I never liked it. Never felt happy on a day that it rained, as the gloominess outside would seep right into my veins and wither me down until the sun shines again. Today isn't much different. While I did smile quite a bit today, something just feels off.
I realize whenever it rains, I have more trouble breathing too. Paranoia kicks in, and I start to worry about people. Maybe a bit too much. But, being the odd little creature I am, I can't show my worry. I smiled my way though a five hour work shift, through chest pains and headaches and thinking about adding to the Venom scene I posted before this. But that smile's no longer sustainable, looking out the dreary window. I should go to sleep, try to get rid of the oncoming depression. But I know It'll come even closer if I try to crawl into bed and close my eyes. Why?
I miss 1 too much. I haven't seen him for what feels like a month, though I'm pretty sure it hasn't been that long. Still, it irritates me that we won't be able to hang out for a few more weeks, due to my being busy and his lack of money. I just want to hug him, cuddle up next to him, conversations and other things sprinkled in between. I want to tell him I love him aloud, hear him say it too. Just thinking about it makes me wish we lived closer, or that I wasn't such a chicken and learned to drive.
I also want to see him so we can plan about Prom. There were so many signs that we had to go, but two of them sealed our fate.
One: In the Disney movie 'Prom', The main characters are Nova(my nickname) and 1's name.
Two: At a gift auction last night, I won two prom bids for Senior Prom 2012, which meant the both of us could go together for cheap(because it's not free when you consider the dress, tux, limo, etc)
I didn't want to go this year due to cost and personal reasons, but once I won those tickets I was so happy, and 1 was also excited. I think I can put my other reasons aside now, and I'm sure we'll have fun. ^^
Yeah, I have no idea where this is going anymore, so I'll shut up now. 8D''
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